Hilarious article on The Onion entitled After 5 Years In U.S., Terrorist Cell Too Complacent To Carry Out Attack.

"We remain wholly committed to the destruction of America, the Great Satan," al-Sharif said. "But now is not a good time for us. The season finale of Lost was such a cliff- hanger that we have to at least catch the first episode of the new season. After that, though, death to the infidels."